this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2024
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In this post, I wrote about the sad experience of having a friend use AI to wish me a happy birthday. https://robertkingett.com/posts/6627/ #AI #Blog #Blogging #Blogs @techtakes @fuck_ai

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This made my heart hurt bud. I hope it didn't overshadow the rest of your day!

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

@o7___o7 Thank you! The audio email from my Dominican friend where he was telling me happy birthday made it all the more epic! There was another person that said, well, don’t be surprised if she writes about you writing about her using AI because that was uncalled for, but I just had such a visceral reaction, I was just like, I need to write about this because I am afraid this is going to get common in Casual settings and not just corporate kind of settings either. Thank you so much for your comment however! It made my night!

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

appreciate ya!

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

@weirdwriter @steve @techtakes @fuck_ai ‘LLMs give us ventriloquism in reverse. The mechanical dummy speaks through your mouth.’
https://www.roughtype.com/?p=9271

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

On the one hand I get why people would use LLMs to write their messages (finding the right words is hard). On the other hand, man is this dystopian. At some point you might as well just send the prompt directly, it has the same amount of information.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

I wanted to see a tired typo in her email from a hard days work. I wanted her to mix up my age. I wanted to see the imperfections in the tired as fuck email because the fact she still wrote to me, even though she was tired and would’ve wrote down my incorrect age, the fact that she thought about me enough to craft something personal would have made everything worth it. @MBM

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

Happy belated birthday!

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

@weirdwriter @techtakes @fuck_ai Happy belated birthday! This post struck a nerve with me because in this case, AI took away one of the last bits of humanity left in our digital communication: a personal message from a real human.

Time and effort are valuable commodities. When your friend offloaded that to an AI, it took away from the value of the message. Maybe they spent time crafting the perfect prompt, but saying “it’s easier” negates that idea.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Thank you! Also, someone else thought the audio friend that sent an audio song to me of happy birthday was also an LLM/AI and that was the actual human one! Yikes! But agreed! Thing is, because I know LLM's super well, I can tell what prompt she used and that just makes me sad because the prompt was something like write a happy birthday email to my writer friend. @mahryekuh @techtakes @fuck_ai

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

@weirdwriter @techtakes @fuck_ai You can make LLM songs but undoubtedly you would have noticed that; that gift sounds lovely, by the way.

Hopefully you and your “AI friend” can work this out together.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I swear this guy is using AI to compose his responses to me on FetLife. Sometimes his intelligence, grammar, and typing just drop off a CLIFF. At first I thought it was just phone vs. keyboard, but the grammatical mistakes he is making aren't the sort that you make because you're on a phone, they're the sort you make if you don't even know English. It's like he's Cyrano de Bergeracing me.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

They could be running it through language translation (as well)

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

was one of the things I thought of too but fet (and also dating/meeting apps) has a longstanding problem of people catfishing. on balance, suspect this form is the more likely case

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

As someone too cowardly to explore their kinks. I lack context. Now you have provided data to reinforce my reticence.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

it's .... not endemic, in the sense of "you'll hit it every 3 profiles" (because fet community + platform seems to do a reasonably good job of handling it from reports etc), but you can see why it's the type of thing that creeps and predators go for

igwym re exploration. comfort, safety, trust, consent - all key. never do anything you don't want to :)

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

It's shocking that FetLife is managing to hold together as long as it has, as well as it has. Like everything it's in decline, but it's still a nice little slice of the golden age of the WWW. It may have a catphishing problem, but what it does not have is a Russian bot problem. It's the only functional social network I'm on other than the Fediverse itself.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

valuable datapoint (in the scope of llms being used for scams and shit) but perhaps not quite the right post to reply to about that, tbh

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I don't see why not. It is a similar experience being the target of AI in the hands of a casual user, in a very personal domain, and invites further exploration of the emotional effects of that kind of interaction. The article was about emotions, not about technology. Now explain to me why my reply doesn't belong.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Ugh, good read yet sad content. The irony of complimenting your writing by using the antithesis of word choice and structure to express emotions. If she was looking to make it easier, then she saw your birthday message as a chore. Some friend.

Happy birthday! ♥

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

@inb4_FoundTheVegan Thank you! The truly sad thing is, because I know LLM’s so well, I even think I know the exact prompt she used. There was another person that said, well, she didn’t make it a generic thing. She put in her prompt that you were a writer. It doesn’t make it thoughtful. Thank you though for Yoyr happy Bday wish! I also came across this after so mine. Very similar https://mrgan.com/ai-email-from-a-friend/

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (2 children)

why are so many posters falling over themselves to Dr Phil it up when OP didn't ask for advice, fucking hell..

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

one of our regulars gently telling you this is a weird thread for you to bring up fetlife is all the justification you needed to spam the whole thread with this shit? fuck off

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

the "I don't see why not" was just ... yeah

talk about not quite fucking getting it.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

@froztbyte My theory is that they feel better giving advice rather than examining their feelings.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

Happy Birthday dude. This blog post capures the modern online experience uncannily well

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

First off I'll be clear: I wouldn't like that either. This is a good moment to take a step back emotionally and clearly word out why slopbot birthday wishes suck.

Still I urge you to come from a place of care when you voice your opinion to your friend. LLMs going mainstream is a new thing so social codes relative to them haven't had time to solidify. Moreover there are plenty of people feeling the pressure to adopt the chatbots lest they become irrelevant, or so they are led to fear. If you appreciate when friends' imperfections show, they're still right there.

Your friend has included things she likes about you in her prompt. For decades, people have gone through a similar process picking a birthday card. (I'm personally partial to dorky e-cards.) If I were you I wouldn't sweat it too much.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

"LLMs going mainstream is a new thing so social codes relative to them haven't had time to solidify."

Good argument for going max aggro, but I'd still use restraint here, despite the desperate need to establish norms of running people out of town with thrown wasp nests when they use an LLM.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

@weirdwriter @techtakes @fuck_ai

What a way to lose a friend.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

Happy birthday !

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

@weirdwriter @techtakes @fuck_ai “it’s just easier”
I prefer a quick ‘happy birthday, I’m thinking of you and wish you the world’ than 3 pages of AI vomit.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

Happy birthday!

And sorry for your sad experience. Annoying how AI is degrading our supposedly genuine interactions (both by people using it like this, and people interpreting a honest message like AI (I do feel a bit sorry for all the people working in low level customer support who in addition to all the normal bullshit now have to deal with AI accusations for example)).

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

@webhat @techtakes @fuck_ai Thank you! Cookies and cakes ahoy! Yum!

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

Sometimes you need to be blunt, and just tell the other person how you feel. You don't need to always understand your friend's emotions and motivations thoroughly, and you're allowed to disagree on things.

I'd tell this Karren:

"a happy birthday message, to me, is that you cared to put effort into something special for me. Even if the result is terrible"

It gets the point across, even if it can be difficult to say. That's just how life is sometimes.

Putting this out there for the world to agree with you on how you dislike what she did? That doesn't sound kind, nice or a thing a good friend would do. In fact it's how some little kids fight in front of their parents.

She'll probably call you back after what you did here

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

At a point in my life I too would have made this mistake. I have been oblivious to how the things I did would make others feel.
It is easy to want to write what we think the other person wants to hear from us, when the reality is that a single sentence that a person has taken the time and thought to write, is far more valuable than word noise generated from a plagiarism machine.

I hope she understands, or you get a chance to explain that to her at some point.

oh and a belated happy birthday to you!

CC: @[email protected] @[email protected]

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)

@nigel @techtakes @fuck_ai Oh yes! Thank you! I will explain to her soon, but thank you for commenting! I can’t find it now but someone else was thinking about all the insincere gifts they received from people, but at the moment, even those insincere gifts seem to be more thoughtful, but yes I will explain when it is a propper time.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

Tiired of picking out gifts the recipient don't need or want? Here at Giftr we have partnered with Amazon to bring you Shit-as-a-service!

Just prompt our chat-bot and we will send a gift to a statistically similar address!

If it never arrives? Well, they didn't want it anyway! Giftr!

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