Bipolar Disorder

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Welcome!

This is a safe place to discuss, vent, and share information about bipolar disorder. It is also a place for peer support and comfort.

Please use empathy and common sense when posting and commenting. We are all in this together, let’s stay kind and civil.

The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

Rules

If you are having thoughts of suicide, please call a friend, family member, 988 in the US, or find transportation to your closest emergency room (call 911 in the US).
Please be sensitive when discussing suicide and self-harm. Posts threatening suicide are subject to immediate removal.
Posts containing medical advice or diagnosing others are not allowed. If you are posting about traditional or alternative treatment methods, please keep the post focused on your personal experience.
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Harassment of any kind is not tolerated. Do not harass any user for any reason including treatment plan/medication adherence, race, religion, gender, sexuality, disability, etc.
You may post bipolar memes and jokes as well as serious content. This rule may change later at the community’s discretion.

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Bipolar Community Weekly Checkin August 11-18th - How are you doing? (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I should not have smoked weed yesterday. The the horrible truth of my situation came crashing down: it's weird for me to live here in the trailer park, not working, living on the fricking porch and hanging out here all day.

I'm stuck. My anxiety is high and I don't want to go anywhere most of the time. I can hear people's thoughts sometimes, or so it seems. I can't drive, and the only other option is walking, or riding a bike which is in disrepair and in storage.

There is no other place for me. Rent's too high everywhere. I spent so long being a hermit and now I just don't want to deal with this. I feel like an alien no matter where I am, but it's even worse here.

F landlords. They can upend your life at snap of their money-grubbing fingers and not give a sht whatsoever.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I can’t help with the weed. It didnt do anything for me. But I CAN relate to it with drinking. I regret it every time.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago

I thought it would be okay since I was doing relatively well. Classic rationalization :p At least I'm doing better now. Did some yard work and chatted with a neighbor a bit, which made me feel normal-ish. I just need to stay away from weed until a distant future time when I'm alone. Thankfully I still don't want to drink.

Thanks for replying~

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Ehh, better than last week.

Final appt coming up in two weeks with my therapist of 3ish years. Still nervous about potential waiting lists.

Got soft diagnosed with BPD today. Explains a lot of my ups and downs on a short term basis.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That’s interesting. I talked about that with my therapist a few months ago. A lot of it makes sense for me I think, but she feels the bipolar is still better. The instant rage swings are awful.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago (1 children)

There's also something called intermittent explosive disorder (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intermittent_explosive_disorder) that causes fits of rage. Before I quit booze I was having something similar very frequently. It was like my brain was being hijacked. I wouldn't be surprised if in addition to bp2 I had that, or bpd...

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago

Ohhhhh that fits… 🧐