Asklemmy

Because you choose to keep going to restaurants where they play loud music. No idea why you're doing that

In some crowded places they do it, so it doesn't feel like a central station.

In India, restaurants generally play smooth music at near audible levels.

I once read that it's an epigenetic thing and it can be found across the animal kingdom. Some animals are born more sensitive and others less and this is important for the species or social group as a whole. This actually happens on a neuron level.

The less sensitive kind needs to actively search out stimulation, whereas you can leave the more sensitive one alone with a flower and they'll be a happy camper.

And there's so much more to it, for example developmental. Have you ever noticed the difference in sound levels in people's homes? In some places it's just like a warzone. TV on max, dogs barking, kids screaming. Imagine growing up with that. Like a fish in water.

And then there's all the processing disorders..

You can train yourself though if you value it. I enjoy encounters and it bothered me a lot, so I just kept going to busy cafés and bars until my brain finally got the memo. It keeps surprising me how my hearing has become like a sort of precision microphone.

Off topic, but related to unwanted noise. Why do white waitstaff/restaurants interupt you when you are talking to someone to ask you "How is everything? Everyone doing ok?". removed look at the plate. I haven't touched it since you gave it to me 30 seconds ago. Take a note from Asians. Silently fill the water, observe the vibe, and go if no one says anything. Or some Latino restaurants where they won't do anything unless you explicitly call them over and ask. I'd take loud music you have to shout over if Cindi with a 'i' doesn't interupt conversations.

Hmm. Processing disorders are a thing.

Some restaurants do have damn loud music, though. Most don't where I live but that's probably regional.

Might be relevant, but I find that American restaurants are generally louder compared to European ones.

Side note: And why is ithe music always fucking neo-country? Sure, I've mostly been to Texas, but I have several albums in my CD collection as a testament to y'all making good music too.

Switched on Pop: Gastropod: Why are restaurants so loud? Plus the science behind the perfect playlist

Episode webpage: http://www.switchedonpop.com

Media file: https://www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/pdst.fm/e/chtbl.com/track/524GE/traffic.megaphone.fm/VMP8607546877.mp3?updated=1715910884

It doesn't seem to be a super common, general thing where I live. However, there are some more prone to it than others, like places that have a bar and/or otherwise serve alcohol. Typically though it's only the nights they do live music and that's most often weekends and around specific holidays.

Mostly I just avoid pretty much any establishment if they've got live entertainment for the night and I'm there to eat as well as talk with others. I avoid any that are particularly egregious in terms of loud music. I have been with a group where we asked if the volume could be turned down on the speakers one night at a live event where we were one of only a few tables in the entire place and it was clear that nobody was particularly interested in damaging their hearing. The manager slowly slinked over to the performers about 5 - 10 minutes after the request, and they stopped playing shortly after.

Most respectable places have music that is loud at the beginning of service when there are few diners, but then the music gets lower as time goes on and the place fills up.

....not that I reread this, I'm really not implying you dont go to reputable places....really

I have ADHD and I find I have lots of difficulties with auditory processing in high noise floor situations. Also got my hearing checked because I couldn't understand people in loud spaces. Turns out ADHD brains just don't handle processing all that noise well. If I understand it correctly it's because we need to process everything at the same level instead of some things being easy to leave on autopilot. Might not be your case but it sounded familiar so, that's my two bits.

Tile or concrete floors, hard surface walls, glass windows all reflect sound. As people start talking, if they are drinking they get louder, so then each table is trying to talk over the tables around them. Without acoustic damping, it can get pretty loud.

It's to encourage you to eat faster and leave, so your table is available for the next victim.