The Onion

4502 readers

755 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

266

Reform voters ‘no understand why Nigel no live in big London house’ (newsthump.com)

submitted 4 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

22 comments fedilink hide all child comments

“Me no get it,” explained Reform Voter Derek Williams, with a deeply furrowed brow and finger in his ear.

“Nigel won. Nigel get house. Nigel the big boss now?” they queried, with all the political sophistication the Reform party has come to rely on during the election campaign.

“Where Nigel? WHERE Nigel??”

When it was explained to Derek that Nigel won a single constituency, out of 650, and that Reform MPs can actually be counted on one hand, Derek looked ever more perplexed.

“Consti-chewsy? Nigel win election. Not Consti-chewsy! Nigel WIN! NIGEL STOP BOATS!”

At this point Derek began to get agitated, and it was decided it was best to calm him by returning him to his natural habitat inside a Wetherspoons with a copy of the Daily Mail in front of him.

all 23 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

If you want to know what a Reform voter looks like, here's a good example

https://x.com/SalfordMe2023/status/1803714304476074137

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Spot on!

Now we need an interview with a Tory voter who believes that those dangerous socialists just kicked Churchill out of Downing Street...

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (2 children)

why is the thumbnail photo one of Dara O'Briain?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

Isn't that the Megabus man without his hat?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

It isn't though?

[–] [email protected] 74 points 4 months ago

If Reform voters could read, they’d be very upset