Asklemmy

The point is that he got born and got to live with you for many years.

Don't focus on the end, focus on all the great moments you had together.

Well if this isn't the most beautiful thread I have seen on Lemmy.. thank you everyone. I'm not crying!

Don't be a reductionist. If that's all your cat was and that's all your relationship was, then fine. If it wasn't, you owe it to that cat to remember all the good times you two had between when it came to life and when it lost its life. Do it for the cat.

Then, when you've finally moved past this point, realize how much joy you gave that cat. Know that you did something beautiful in letting that cat know it was loved from beginning to end. Think about the cat's perspective. Its death may have sucked; they rarely don't. Now think about every moment that cat experienced growing up and being with you. Every sense of relief that cat felt when you came home. Every wave of comfort when you gave it pets. Every moment of safety it felt when you cared for it.

I know how sad you are, and I know this is tough love here, but that's what carried me through losing my dog on Christmas 2022 and her sister December 16th 2023. We did our best. They couldn't have had happier lives. I'm glad we could do that for them. It was worth the weeks of agonizing grief for the 14 and 16 years of happiness they experienced.

Yes

Still you got to love, didn’t you? Love always leads to heartbreak. But at least there is love and those small moments between the two of you that must have been incredibly precious. That’s all there is to life, I believe.

Edit: trust me, there are worse ways to live. For example, life lived chasing illusions such as money, fame or power.

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's hard to lose a loved one of any species

Life sucks, no doubt, but you're here and you have to get used to it. The best advice I can provide is slurp up all the good moments you can and savor the taste, so their memories will get you through the hard spots. Repeat until dead.

If you are sad because you lost your cat, that means you loved it. So yes, you live, you suffer but you also love. Im sure you made your little friend very happy as it made you and Im sure you gave it a great life that few creatures in this planet can have. If you made such a difference on a living creature, you can do it again. Maybe that is the point of all this.

Maybe not for you, but for some of us, we would help to look into Buddhism and its Four Noble Truths.

Very simplistic tl;dr is that

1. All life involves suffering.
2. We suffer because we want things to be other than the way they are.
3. We can become free from suffering if we no longer want things to be other than the way they are.
4. The Eightfold Path can lead one to each 3.

I truly believe that events have no meaning until we impose meaning on them. It is our work, as humans, to do so. It is the essence of creativity, of being, and of life itself. Meaning doesn't comes prepackaged, no one can provide meaning for you or me. There isn't "true" meaning out there for us to discover. There are meaningful answers we can provide, after wrestling with the event itself.

Your cat existed for a purpose. Perhaps it was to show you love and companionship for a time during this difficult life. Only you can say. But honor the creature you loved by finding the meaning in its life. It lived for a reason.

On the large scale of thing, able to witness time through a small window we call our existence, entirely locked from interacting with what happens before or after. It's a bid sad to know that we won't ever be able to witness some historical events, but that's just how life is.

There's no universal reason in living, it's just a wild ride that we witness and try to make sense of. Consider this: your cat's existence, however long or short, contained mostly your presence and affection, and while he's now gone, remember that you gave him the best life you could, filled with you in it. For your point of view, it's a small time window, but for him it was an entire life.

My condolences, and hope you can find some solace by reminiscing the time spent together with him.

I'm sorry. We just got back from taking a cat we loved to be cremated.

Do we just live and suffer and die?

Yep, that's pretty much it as far as I can tell.

The living part can be good sometimes. There's cheese and purring. But living suffering and dieing pretty much covers it.

If you find comfort in words and ideas, I found the chinese text called the Zhuangzi helped me come to accept the world with less bitterness. It's quite funny and thoughtful, silly and logical.

My cat died April 16th, 2023. Had a few, never have another. Can I share my story? I swear there's a point at the end.

Adopted her from a local redditor, who had only had her a month. She was always tiny, but at some point, cancer wasted her overnight. By the time I noticed her collar falling off her 1.5" neck it was too late. We found her dead in the hallway the next night.

She sat on my lap every night, and that's all she wanted, simple affection. I was single, excepting a friend with benefits, for the short time I had her. She was my solace, my peace.

She didn't do any of the typical cat meme stuff, just kinda hung around. Rarely left the yard, just sat in the shadow of my truck when it was hot, chilled inside when it was cold. Always low energy, but no issues the vet could point to.

Anyway, I buried her out at my personal chunk of swamp in the boonies. Fought for 30 minutes to cut through cypress roots, but I wanted her to rest in a nice shady spot by the water. Didn't think anyone would give a shit, but my friends all rolled out. I'm the guy in the cowboy hat. I salute her grave every time I pass.

Mom died 2-weeks ago, on my birthday. I cried for that cat far more than for her. I get you. I feel you.

So yeah, we live and die. Suffering? I dunno. Did my cat suffer? She certainly did for at least some of her life. But she certainly didn't after I got her. At least she was as happy as I knew how to make her.

Suffering is only possible if you're alive. Hell, we could be atoms embedded in a Jovian moon, but at least we're here to feel. And that's pretty fucking wild if you think about it. Being alive is a fabulous gift, even though it has its downsides.

the entire existence of all living things is the struggle. some thrive, some don't.

but we do it all for the good days. if it was all good days, we wouldn't appreciate them like we do. the darkness gives meaning to the light, and the bad days give meaning to the good ones.

i'm sorry about your cat. it can be rough to lose a loved one. but that doesn't mean there won't be more good days.

Yes and no. On one (nihilistic) hand, you live to die. The other hand (the better one) is that you give your own meaning to live. Fill in the spaces between the living, dying, and suffering parts, to make them seem insufficient in comparison. Just like the time you spent with your cat.

Nothing makes either side any less true - it's all up to interpretation. For your mental health, though, it's better to follow the latter.

I'm sorry about your kitty. I had to put mine to sleep last Monday and man the first 3 days were rough. I miss him so much now but I'm getting better every day. You will too. It never goes away but it gets easier. The point of it all is to give your kitties the best possible life and never stop loving them. Here is my old man Stanley.

When my dog died a few months ago cried harder than I had in probably 15 years on and off for a solid week. It’s brutal. But I promise it will get a little more bearable as time passes. Doesn’t feel like it right now, but it will. And the best part is that it’s not like they just disappear from your life. It will become more bearable, and the tragedy will give way to wonderful memories that you share over and over.

Welcome to the philosophy of absurdism.

Life has no meaning, nothing has purpose.

In this freedom find the space to make your own meaning and your own purpose.

You kitty likely had a long kitty life with someone who loved them and who they loved. You created purpose where none existed for the both of you.

I am sorry for the loss of your kitty my dude, I’m sorry you’re hurting.

You shared love and joy. Soon it will be time to share more love and joy with another that's in need.

It hurts. I had to put my cat of 18 years down last year and it hurt for a long while. But I wouldn’t trade having her as my friend; the end was sad and rough, but I made sure she had as good of a life as I could give her the entire time she was with me. We can’t do much better than that for our furry friends.

Hang in there friend, it does get better with time.

The universe exists and is beautiful. We exist to appreciate and explore that beauty. It sounds like you had wonderful experiences with your cat and both you and your cat benefitted from your shared time. It's important to remember that getting that time and those memories were worth the pain of parting.

Your cat had a good life and loved you and then died. There doesn't have to be a point, there's more good than suffering.

ive had to say goodby to a few pet friends now. i dont regret having my pet friends.

we got to enjoy each others company, and honestly the pet gets the better end of this deal if their people are sound.

Yeah pretty much. What you do in the meantime is up to you.

Pets are particularly weird because we get them knowing damn well we will outlive them. I view it as giving the little babies as close to a perfect life, and as comfortable a passing as pawssible.