Ask

I don’t know you, so I don’t know why people might avoid you, but I was thinking of something slightly related while on the train yesterday. I have a very strong sense of smell, so bad odours are very off putting for me, even mine when I sweat, or fry something…stuff like that. So yesterday I was sitting in the train, and someone came in at some point and sat right behind me. I did not see that person, but I smelled him!!! It was stinking of cigarettes as if he was an ashtray. I had to move, because it was making me want to throw up. I al not exaggerating.

But I do know, not everyone has this sense of smell, some might be oblivious of their own smell. I had a colleague in high school that was extremely stinky. He was not a bad guy I guess, but I did not talk too often with him because I was avoiding coming too close because of the smell.

So I was thinking yesterday, wouldn’t it be helpful to have some sort of independent person give an honest and not mean opinion, on what is “wrong” with us in terms of what is off putting to the others. Some people are I am sire genuinely good people, but maybe they have an odour problem that they don’t know about, and maybe can be fixed. Or maybe they are trying to much and too fast to be a friend for someone and the others feel like their space is invaded too quickly. Not everyone has skills to read non verbal messages.

But how do you give feedback to the people that are off putting for you if they don’t ask for that feedback? It would be rude and probably poorly received. I am a quite direct person, and even I would not tell people they literally stink, because it might me it is just an I problem.

Do you have close friends or family that you could ask for kind advice? Or maybe try a neutral person, like a psychologist. Although that one would not see you in your interactions. Maybe you could analyse and record in your memory details of the interactions and have someone review those details. As I said, could even be something like you are too fast in getting close or person to the others, and they have another pace.

This wouldn't surprise me either, they were under such pressure.

I wouldn't be at all surprised by the JFK one, there's so much about that we don't know and clearly there's more to the story. What's the mafia link?

I agree on UFOs, there's something at the bottom of it all. There's no way we're alone in the universe