nextcloud
Nextcloud is a suite of client-server software for creating and using file hosting services.
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But I understand I need a reverse proxy, it doesn't change the fact that you require a domain name, a let's encrypt cert and open port 80 to use the AIO setup. But I appreciate the link all the same.
normally you would configure a reverse proxy to secure your apps and setup SSL
the AIO installation here assumes a domain https://github.com/nextcloud/all-in-one#nextcloud-all-in-one
if you don't use a domain it'll use a self-signed cert. many different ways to implement web security. the reverse proxy is documented and supported. https://github.com/nextcloud/all-in-one/blob/main/reverse-proxy.md
they mention a caddy/tailscale alternative which would be your "VPN Supported" configuration https://github.com/nextcloud/all-in-one/discussions/5439
Nice ! Thanks for the links , now this does point me in the right direction. Much appreciated.