"Based on your description it seems like that would be called female privilege but I don’t think I’ve ever heard that phrase used in a genuine fashion before."

I don't get the concept that you need to hear other people use 'female privilege' specifically in some kind of way for there to be privilege to be applied to women, that's a very strange Idea, white women in particular have often been used as the biggest examples of white privilege, both as the persons being favored and the enforce or catalyst of violence. You seem much more wrapped up in some kind of sectarian US Against THEM dichotomy rather than even engaging with the discussion.