this post was submitted on 17 Jul 2024
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The Onion

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5 Summer Activities Sure to Ruin Your Lawn Summer is here, and that means one thing: it’s time to watch in horror as your lawn turns into a post-apocalyptic wasteland. Why fight it? Embrace the inevitable chaos with these five activities guaranteed to obliterate that golf course-caliber lawn you’ve been working years on. You might as well lay down wood chips and call it a day, because those little savages will destroy it by fall one way or another.

1. Slip and Slide Ah, the slip and slide – the classic summer activity that promises fun, laughter, and a lawn that looks like it hosted a mud-wrestling tournament. After a few hours of kids hurling themselves down a plastic sheet at breakneck speed, your once-lush grass will be nothing more than a distant memory. The combination of water and trampling is sure to create a muddy disaster zone. Just remember, mud is nature’s way of saying, “You never really liked grass that much anyway.”

Read the rest of the satire news article here at TattletaleTimes.com

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 months ago (1 children)

They forgot water balloons! impossible to pick up all of them

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I came across these sponges inside a poly-cotton sort of covering, called Water Grenades. They work great, and are reusable. Just dunk them in the refill bucket, and throw at someone. !Splash! And repeat.

Something like this: https://www.vat19.com/item/reusable-water-bombs or these: https://www.etsy.com/market/reusable_water_bombs

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

i like the idea of the crochet ones. sent that to my crocheting wife to give it a shot, thanks!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

I just learned of them in the process of that search. We have a momentous water battle coming up at a campout, beginning of next month. Super excited!!