this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2024
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It's been a very long week. I'm glad it's almost over, and I'll have two rest days until next week starts. My depression got slightly worse due to someone unexpected coming back into my life, someone I thought I'd never talk to or hear from again. I was getting accustomed to no longer having this person around, and I realised I was doing much better without them. My anxiety was under control; I was making more gains in the gym than ever, girls(and guys!) started paying more attention to me whenever I went out, and I was finally trying out new hobbies!
Then, out of nowhere, four weeks ago or so, I got a message on my WhatsApp. Despite being in a much better place now, I engaged with them. I knew it was a bad idea from the get-go, but part of me was still clinging to the past, I suppose. Finally, I did what I should've done aeons ago: I closed our communication channels yesterday when they inevitably brought more drama into my life that I didn't need. We've known each other for 22 years, and part of me will sorely miss them, but I think I'm much better off without them.
I've been training a lot and got into natural bodybuilding over the past few months. I finally found a coach that seems pretty good, and I'm hoping we can start training after the summer once I'm back from my parents' place. Sadly, all of this has messed up my recovery as it has substantially increased my stress levels. Hopefully, it'll all be back on track soon. Being an HSP makes this situation harder, but I think I'm better equipped now than ever. It's only up from here! (I hope!)
Sorry for the wall of text. It's been a very long week, and I suppose I needed to vent somewhere.