this post was submitted on 26 Jan 2024
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[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Claiming that being a femboy is necessarily partially kink is harmful.

Sorry, that's not what I meant at all. Being a femboy absolutely does not have to be kink related at all.

Would you say the same about other nonbinary people? Is being a tomboy driven by kink? Is being trans driven by kink?

Absolutely not.

What I mean is that the femboy label has sort of a split nature in the public eye as an identity and as a fetish. These two aspects generally coexist without problems, because context exists and most people have the self awareness to not treat masc people presenting fem as fetish objects. Then, when they don't, you get posts like this. I think I misspoke when I said "as a concept". I didn't mean that the two natures of it were tied together per person, being masc and presenting fem absolutely doesn't need to be related to sexuality at all. Just that essentially it exists as both an identity and as a kink, both using the term femboy, and that we suffer from not being more specific/using more specific terminology to distinguish the two.

I think you’re telling on your own views more than you’re explaining how the world works.

Well, yeah, I'm talking about my view and my understanding of the world. What I'm saying is through the lens of my perception and understanding.

Identity exists separate from sexuality, full stop.

Yes, I agree.

Unless you want to revoke all trans and nonbinary identities from aro/ace people too.

I'm not trying to invalidate anyone here =/ I hope you understand what I meant better now.