Apple

It's been a few weeks now and I think I understand the problem better. It's not solved.

First, it appears to really be that they mean it when they say to disconnect all connections when connecting the phone to the adapter. In my case, this is impractical: I have a smart watch, a smart ring, and smart glasses, and I have them for reasons. And I am frequently stopping and restarting the engine, which of course restarts the adapter (and I wondered if the power cycling was inducing premature failure).

What I'm seeing now is that the problem is occasional and unpredictable. This misled me as to the source of the problem. I thought it was the adapter. But it turns out that if I just wait five minutes, the longest five minutes ever, after getting the message, the adapter will try again to connect to the phone and probably succeed.

It happens I wound up renting a 2022 Jeep Compass for a couple of weeks. The head unit in this car, though clearly not top of the line, was capable of CarPlay over bluetooth. This seemed more robust, more reliable, but not entirely so. I don't have any idea how to account for this difference. Glitches still happened.

What I notice is that whether it's the head unit or an adapter, wifi is unavailable while connected. I infer that this connection uses both bluetooth and wifi and that part of what the initialization process involves is handshaking to establish both connections. I suspect that it's the wifi that's problematic, but I often start my car at home, where there are multiple wifi signals, including more than one that my phone knows about, without incident. So it's not just that my phone is already connected to wifi. There's more to it but I don't know what.

In the long term, I'll probably give in and upgrade the head unit. The display on the Jeep Compass was much improved over the one in my (one year older) RAV4. I noticed it was much easier to navigate with this display and that's important. But the mounting bracket that should (and probably does) work with my car has not been confirmed to fit. So it seems I have to wait.

EDIT: Wait I’m sorry I see I misunderstood what you are asking about. I assumed you didn’t have a CarPlay screen. Disregard.

Original post:

So I haven’t tried these yet, but I’ve been watching a lot of videos about them. I’m not sure this would work for you, but I’m eying one of these for my 82 truck that still has its factory tape deck:

LAMTTO 9.26" Wireless Car Stereo Apple Carplay with 2.5K Dash Cam, 1080P Backup Camera, Portable Touchscreen GPS Navigation for Car, Car Stereo Receiver with Bluetooth, AirPlay, AUX/FM, Googel, Siri

To me, for 100 bucks this beats the heck out of replacing an otherwise decent head unit or just using Bluetooth. It can connect to a line in, then your phone connects to the device with wireless CarPlay.

You may need to confirm that your lighter loses power when the ignition is turned off, otherwise you may have to wire in to keyed power somehow, or remember to unplug it when you exit the car, but that’s really the case with any of these devices I imagine.

Aside from line out, it has a built in fm transmitter or will connect to a cars built in Bluetooth if you have that.

Again, I haven’t gotten one of these yet, but based on reviews I’ve seen, this seems to be the best one to get so far.

The one I have been using successfully for the last 2+ years is made by “Carlinkit”

Every now and then, it will take a long time or outright fail to pair, requiring that I power cycle it. Happens maybe every 2-3 weeks, I average 2-4 pairings per day.

Otherwise, the experience is mostly seamless.

Perhaps the voltage regulator in your alternator is throwing a big voltage spike on the 12V supply, killing your adapters. There are large capacitors made for car audio that will stop spikes. Try one of those.

I've used the same Bluetooth adapter for 10 years+

Must be something odd going on in your vehicle for them to die.

Do you really need CarPlay? I’ve been relying on phone mounts in my car for years. Now with MagSafe, I stick my iPhone on and stream audio over Bluetooth, no plug/unplug. Aside from that, viewing navigation on my iPhone allows me to move around the map so I can see what turns are coming up. The CarPlay decks I’ve seen don’t allow moving around the map on screen and only show text directions on iPhone. For me, stick-and-go is a better and seamless experience.

If you have any interest in this route, I highly recommend the Nite Ize Steelie system for mounting. Their MagSafe system works with Apple’s MagSafe charger (or without if you don’t need constant charging) with a variety of mounting options.

Check out the AAWireless dongle. It's mainly for Android, but its beta version seems to have CarPlay support.

If you’re willing to shop on Amazon (I use Amazon only if I have to) they have a wireless CarPlay adapter that work pretty flawlessly I got mine for $100. All the steering wheel control works in my car (2017 Audi A3). There is an audio delay while watching videos but I believe that’s with all wireless CarPlay applications. I’ll link to the exact one I got. However they have one that says “upgrade” for cheaper but I do not have that one so I can’t say if it’s any better.

(TLDR) The adapter linked works just like plugging in regular CarPlay.

https://a.co/d/2evBZwn

(Edit) a few added details

It may not be possible with a car that new depending on if the stereo does other things than just audio, but you may want to consider an aftermarket Pioneer, Kenwood, etc. Our car is so old that it's stereo did nothing but audio so replacing it was easy, but yours might be more difficult. You could always check with a car stereo shop and see if it is possible with your car.

Do you have an aux input? I had good results with aux input Bluetooth in the past.