Redbull would beg to differ
Lemmy Shitpost
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
It's a good thing they included the coin for scale otherwise we might have just assumed this person had Trump sized hands (another completely valid and totally real unit of measure, the greatest unit of all time actually)
The first line took a while to read. First try I got what could be written as:
"Sizes of energy drink can pelts, we salute you"
I mean "drink can pelts" is a weird way to say aluminum
Well, I mean it's less weird to write "golf ball-sized hail" bcause it's a rather common way to describe the size of hail. Energy drink cans are cylindrical, so it doesn't make immediate sense in anyone's brain in the sentence as a comparison. I'm guessing the author couldn't think of a common enough spherical item of the right size to compare with. Still, I think hyphens would have immediately fixed the strangeness, like the person below you commented.
Sports equipment and fruit are the common comparison for spherical objects.
"Grape sized hail" is quick and easy. "Softball sized" gives the proper "holy shit that's huge" reaction.
I like the spherical references. I don’t know why he wouldn’t stick with balls.
Or commas, and better grammar, would have done wonders, too.
"Hail, the size of energy drink can[s], pelt[ed] Texas [...]"
"energy-drink-can-sized hail..." is how I would have written it. Or, y'know, used numbers like a sane person.
I'm ngl, this was so hard to read. Why does english have 2 meanings for can?
Also pelts can mean fur or yeet
Imagine a language invented by a drunken german who thought french sounded nice. That's english in a nutshell
Can you do the can can whilst canning peas and drinking a can of monster all whilst on the can?
Also, why should we hail the size of energy drink cans?
I'll tell you a secret. I've never had an energy drink in my life so I don't even know it's size.
Three. Depending on where you are in the U.S., a toilet is also a "can". It's more of a slang meaning, but if you ever hear an American saying they're "going to go hit the can," it means they're going to use the bathroom.
Funny, I've never seen an energy drink come in a can that small.
Low key convinced this started out as "monster hail" and then got butchered by an AI or like 5 Google translate passes
Fuck border patrol, I hereby upgrade "possible tornado" to "neighborhood tornado watch"
"possible tornado" hurt someone?
What?
Well, you can have a funnel cloud, but it's not a tornado until the condensation funnel touches the ground, and it's not always clear what the case is until proper surveying is done.
Was it one or was it not?
Someone wanted comp and the government is filled with gullible idiots.
quick! pour some Gatorade on the crops so it grows better
Inb4 euros still being mad about "they'll use anything but metric!"
Inb4
Nope, you're late.
Quickly, shrinkflate the energy drinks
Media is in cahoots - groundwork laid for the gaslight
How to actually read this:
Hail the size of energy. (Meaning 'Glory to the size of energy')
Drink can pelts Texas while possible tornado injuries US Border Patrol agent.
How do you get the pelt off of an energy drink can, though?
A surprising lot of them are re-skinned, actually, so that’s a legit thing. Depending on your definition of pelt.
Lots of cans that were printed for discontinued lines, or printed before a label change, have plastic sleeves over the can to re-brand them, even when the label on the old and new is identical..
Or, is it drink can doing the pelting of Texas? Also an interesting option
In other news, several border patrol agents seen chasing tornado with tasers drawn.
Someone alert Alex Horne
Using republican logic, God hates the border patrol.
based tornado
Hail the size of Pillsbury Toaster Strudel