The Onion

My opinions about guns have changed over the years. I used to be of the opinion that nobody should have guns in this day and age, what's the point aside from ego boosting and sport.

Then a cheeto puff did a treason on jan6.

I'll give up my guns only after the fascists give up theirs. Non negotiable.

You want to "prevent tragedies"? fund programs for welfare and healthcare. Tax the rich. Break up megacorps like google, albertsons, nestle. Enact and enforce employee protections. Raise the minimum wage. Ban airbnb and heavily tax empty residences. Universal basic income! Did I mention fixing the healthcare system? More that I'm forgetting to list.

Miserable parents make miserable kids, and miserable kids lash out. For the wealthiest and most powerful nation on the planet, this shouldn't be hard to figure out.