this post was submitted on 17 Sep 2024
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Laura Loomer insists she and Donald Trump are very close.

While Donald Trump’s allies have tried to create the illusion of distance between the Republican presidential nominee and Laura Loomer, the alt-right conspiracy theorist has continued to cozy up to him, going so far as to brag over the weekend that Trump “likes” and “trusts” her.

“The media is full of shit. OK?” Loomer said on her podcast, ​​Loomer Unleashed, on Saturday. “These people are liars. They are con artists, and all they do is lie. They are running a coordinated smear campaign because I am effective. Donald Trump likes me. Donald Trump trusts me. OK?


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[–] [email protected] 84 points 2 days ago (3 children)

She's 31 years old.

Hate ages you.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago

10 pounds of heavy duty makeup since you were 12 years old also ages you

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Learned this yesterday.

Thoughts that came to mind:

  1. She is 100% not human
  2. EWWWW TRUMP IS FUCKING HER
  3. EWWWW SHES FUCKING TRUMP
  4. This election is a shit show for the GOP lol
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago
  1. This election is a shit show for the GOP lol
  1. Trump is still polling at 47%
  2. The entire country is a shit show.
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

'member when your dad/friends/strangers told you "don't put your dick in crazy"? (for those of us with)

there is way too much crazy in this scenario to even begin sorting it out. its literally a null in the universe. a divide by zero, if you will. shits so weird now we need an event horizon to hide this naked singularity.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

Ooo storytime: See I had been told it. The problem was I was young and didn't know what crazy was.

I didn't recognize that having a father who wasnt home until after you went to bed, drank heavily, and didn't do much but listen to music and watch TV was a very bad thing. I also apparently didn't realize that "daddy issues" means "seeking a replacement father in someone significant and confusing my attachment with them and a parental figure."

Let this be a warning to all men: Never stick your dick in crazy.

[–] [email protected] 50 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

lol wait what. No fucking way.

Edit: oh my fucking god she was born in 93 what the actual fuck happened to her in childhood such that she turned into this so quickly

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Holy shit I definitely thought she was late 40s, I can't believe she's younger than me

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Yeah, and I think she's had plastic surgery to fit herself into that weird mold of Melania and Kim Guilfoyle, dark hair, wide cheekbones and squinty eyes covered in heavy eyeliner and mascara. She was actually kind of cute looking before that (though still ugly in her views).

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

This is the power of the Dark Side

[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 days ago (2 children)

holy fuck you mean she's younger than me? I call myself an old man all the time but I don't look quite as old as she does yet.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

hoooooly shit I'm six years older and look better. and I've had no work done lmao

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Same - I was floored. I thought she was like 50something at least if the was enthusiastically shagging Trump.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago (2 children)

And then there's his smell. I've heard about how terrible he smells clothed, imagine it once the clothes come off.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

There goes my appetite

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Maybe during the rhinoplasty, she asked for those smelly bits to be snipped/disconnected? /S?